Another Cluster Experience in Berlin… (Review: Lode & Stijn)

14 June 2019

I was in Berlin rather unexpectedly. Two weeks before my trip, that rubbish airline called Turkish Airlines cancelled my flight to Sarajevo. The only alternative they gave me involved a 7 hour overnight layover in Istanbul, which is absolutely unacceptable. And of course they offered no compensation, so I took the full refund. But 2 weeks before departing, I was stuck, needing to get from Oslo to Sofia. So I came up with a short stop in Berlin, as it was the most economic way of getting between the two places.

I therefore came up with a busy schedule for myself, not helped by the previous day’s delay nor the lacklustre dinner at Khwan. I headed out into the very hot and sunny day early, and spent the morning exploring the amazingly-preserved Jewish Cemetery at Weißensee… It’s mind-boggling how this place survived not just the war and the horrors of the Nazi regime, but also the DDR, which had a bad habit of bulldozing cemeteries for construction purposes. I ended up spending far more time exploring this amazing piece of Berlin’s history, a true living museum…

Many more stops throughout the extremely warm day, and I was worn out. No time for lunch, and when I got back to my hotel room in late afternoon I managed to collapse for a short time before heading right out to dinner. Tonight’s destination is Lode & Stijn, a small place I heard nice things about. I originally wanted to return to the quite good Tulus Lotrek, but alas they are on their summer break…

I got to Lode & Stijn and relaxed, looking over the menu. They had an additional course to their 5-course tasting, and I went for it as I was hungry having not eaten since last night. I also went for the pairing but asked for a drink beforehand for the snacks, as it was extremely warm inside the dining room. The first snack then appeared…

Bitterballen, a dutch fried meatball, lived up to the Dutch roots of this eatery. Not bad, especially with the pétillant naturel.

Next up a nice herb and green strawberry dish, a nice palate cleanser. So far pretty good. Then the final snack, tartar.

Quite nice veal tartar here, with a touch of anchovy to really bring it out. I’m pretty happy with things so far, despite the really uncomfortable heat. A nice Mosel Riesling is poured and we have the first proper course…

The “spring” crudité was quite delicious, with some sheep yoghurt. Lovely fresh vegetables, perhaps only marred by the unnecessary distraction of pickled rhubarb. Pretty good dish, but I was sweating quite a bit now, and was only second jug of water already. I was a little concerned it took over 20 minutes between the last snack and the first dish, despite the restaurant being less than half empty.

It took another 20 minutes before they poured the next wine, a nice Blauer Silvaner, and brought the second dish — the asparagus.

The asparagus was quite nice, especially the lardo that wrapped it. The hollandaise was completely unnecessary and untouched. And now things start to totally fall apart from mildly annoying to total clusterfuck. It took over 45 MINUTES before the next dish was presented…

This was the additional dish, sea bass with chanterelles. But by this point I was livid, and they were apologising for the “confusion” on why a crudo dish took this long. This is after I asked several times what was going on. 45 minutes, really? Not bad, but by this time my appetite and patience for this comedy was spent. And it’s bloody hot inside, and I’m almost ready for my 3rd jug of water…

I was almost ready to abandon this dinner, as the service staff seems completely oblivious to how annoyed I am. I have such bad luck with Dutch and Dutch-influenced places, as this brings back a bad memory of a terrible night at Breda in Amsterdam a few months ago…

Next dish came out at a far more sensible time, red mullet. Usually one of my favourite fish, but I had lost my appetite in the boiling hot dining room. The ouzo’d perlato was pretty lame, and the fish was not cooked well. Sigh… This place is a cluster…

And the final dish, of which I wasn’t even focused on anymore, was Maibock. I usually cherish good spring venison, but I didn’t even care about this dish at this point. Wasn’t bad, but at this point nothing this kitchen can bring out can save this evening. I just want to get the hell out of here.

The dessert was berry and joghurt-centric, and I scarfed it down as it was cool. So needed something cool in this boiling room. Even those sitting near me complained to themselves how many jugs of water they had consumed, and I noticed a few other diners less than pleased and not even finishing their dishes.

Sorry, this is NOT how to run a restaurant, especially on a Friday evening. And when a restaurant is half-empty on a Friday evening? That’s a terrible sign. Now I know why. And the staff was barely apologetic about the cock-up. Frankly tonight was a total fail front and back of the house. Berlin…this happens so damn often here…

I stepped out of the restaurant about 3 hours after I stepped into it. For a 5+1-course dinner. This is utterly ridiculous. A wasted night of my life I couldn’t get back. Frankly the dõner kebab I got en route back to my hotel was more enjoyable than this cluster of a meal.

Just avoid this place until (if) they get their act together…

Lode & Stijn
Lausitzerstraße 25
Berlin, Deutschland

Review: Khwan

13 June 2019

It was a fun albeit short stay in Oslo, but was time to move on. This hectic trip continues in Berlin, where I was met with a rather nasty traffic jam (don’t @ me, it was Tegel) thanks to all the roadworks and just extremely poorly-timed traffic signals. Took nearly an hour to get to my hotel near Alexanderplatz…

Thanks to that, I was running late, so only could get a limited amount of things done that afternoon. I then headed to dinner, where I was hoping for a feast at Khwan. I noticed that it has a similar feel to Kiln in London, which I loved during my previous visit and a place I hope to revisit in a few days when I get to blighty.

And the irony of it being on Revalerstraße — named after the town I lived in for many years, one that I still call my long-lost home… But sadly Revalerstraße is one of Berlin’s most down-market party streets, looking somewhere between a slum and a squat frankly… I found Khwan amidsts all the refuse strewn all over the place and the drug-addled dregs of humanity…yeah, I’m getting old…

It was a very warm day and it was extremely warm inside, so I took a seat outside — and for the next hour or so fought off bees that wanted my rum cocktail… In any case, I was hungry as I skipped lunch, so I ordered a few items to start with. Soon they started to arrive…

First up was the fried chicken, which sadly was very meh. Very low on flavour, it seems someone in the kitchen did nothing else to this but to fry it, forgetting any seasoning, spices or whatever. Plain protein…

The moo yang (pork neck) was far better, but nowhere as good as ones I’ve had elsewhere — especially in Thailand. I had a flashback to the excellent version at the airport in Bangkok and sighed… At least the portion was good. I was still totally hungry and ordered another cocktail and a larger dish. After awhile it arrived…

A fried sea bream, again lots of protein, but again lacked in flavour. It seems aside from the moo yang, they forgot to season anything else. Too bad, as this could have been excellent. I finished the fish, the marauding bees didn’t seem as interested in it compared to the empty cocktail glass. But sadly some folks around were starting to smoke up the place (outside seating…) and I had about enough.

I didn’t bother with dessert or anything, just settled up and headed out. Luckily the tram diversion made it actually easier for me to get back to my hotel, so I left this neighbourhood behind. I’m certainly too old (and judgemental) for this area… And sadly, the food didn’t live up to its reputation at all — the story of Berlin in a nutshell.

Khwan
Revalerstraße 99
Berlin, Deutschland

Review: Kolonialen

12 June 2019

I had a rather busy Wednesday in Oslo, it being my only full day here in the Norwegian capital. Running around all over the city, I even managed to pay my respects to the great Fridtjof Nansen — the explorer who did so much to help refugees that earned him the Nobel Peace Prize. I had wanted to visit his grave since my trek up to Spitzbergen many years ago, and I finally managed that this early afternoon.

After a rather lame lunch at the Central Rail Station, I needed a wee break. Plus, I had to deal with various logistical issues for tomorrow’s departure, so that took the rest of the afternoon. I was looking forward to dinner tonight at Kolonialen, the new venture by sommelier-extraordinaire Pontus Dahlström.

The former Maaemo co-founder, with whom I always enjoyed chatting (especially about the Finno-Esto space), was sadly not in this day; I had wanted to at least say hello. But I relaxed and enjoyed some good beverages as I ordered. And not much later, my opening snack arrived.

Maaemo this isn’t! But don’t knock this, this simplicity is wonderful. Beautiful tin of Portuguese sardines, with that glorious oil that works wonder with the bread. This is something I love doing at home, and here it’s as enjoyable. A good start. Next up, some scallops.

Quite delicious. I know the scallops from the nearby Faroe Islands have really ruined me, but the west coast of Norway is pretty much the same waters, and these were beautifully sweet. Excellent, with tinges of salsify, apple and black garlic.

So far I am enjoying this dinner far more than last night at Galt, which was good but I think a bit too “over-chef’d” with what were excellent ingredients. Here, the ingredients rule, which is so refreshing to experience within the culinary radius of Copenhagen… Next up, veal tongue.

Oh my these are fabulous. I love when tongue is cooked so well that it retains its unique taste and also its texture without it being difficult to eat. This was done perfectly, such lovely flavours. I am very particular about my tongue, and this is one of the best I’ve had in years.

This is a wonderful surprise, and I’m glad Pontus has helped to create another gem in Oslo. It’s worth a Michelin for sure, but I suspect its founder has had more than enough of the BS that comes along with that accolade. But easily worth a detour, especially if you want to taste the fresh flavours of Norway — without that culinary detour through a heavy-handed, Copenhagen-blighted kitchen.

Kolonialen
Sofies gate 16
Oslo, Norge

* Later in the evening I had a nice stop at Torggata Botaniske, a cute little cocktail bar very close to the heart of Oslo not far from the famed Sentrum music venue. A nice way to close out my short Oslo trip.

Review: Galt

11 June 2019

Thanks to that good lunch from 15 East, it fuelled me all the way over the Atlantic. A short red-eye is never good, but got to Heathrow and was shocked at how quickly immigration is now thanks to the automated gates. Goodness, I can’t even count the hours I’ve spent waiting here over the decades in Terminal 3… Unfortunately the chaotic immigration in Oslo, to where I connected, slowed my entire afternoon down considerably.

I had a busy time in the Norwegian capital, as the long summer days allowed me to do some exploring before a late-ish dinner time. Tonight’s dinner is at one of the very few Michelin places I’ll be visiting on this trip, Galt. It’s one of the heralded, 1-star places in Oslo that has opened since my last visit here a few years back, and I was looking forward to seeing what they can come up with to impress me. I was skipping my usual Oslo stop, Maaemo, this time around, as I didn’t want to have too long of dinners…

I got to Galt as the place was already quite busy. I squeezed into my table and relaxed with a nice drink. I looked over the menu and since I was hungry, I asked for 2 additions to the set menu that they offered. I’ve not had any real food since that sushi lunch, so…

And we start with a selection of Norwegian oysters. Quite nice, though shucked a bit messily. Then a nice selection of local cured meats…

Tasty, but as I mentioned in my previous review my phone was stolen and I lost my notes on all my meals, so I’ll have to use my memory for all of these descriptions. The game salami was okay, but the coppa was the real winner. Then we have a pair of amuse to start the proper meal off…

I’m sorry I don’t remember the first, but it was a tasty crisp with something grated over it. But I do remember the tartar, which was the second, which was delicious. I do apologise for the poor memory, but as I had committed detailed notes I had let my brain wander…

Then soon the first course appeared, focused on kohlrabi.

It was not bad, the kept in the sour cream brought out something nice I remember.

At this point the noise coming from several adjacent tables were starting to annoy me. They seem to revel in making as much noise as they can when they push back on their chair to get up (to smoke, restroom, etc)…why??? Did you have parents who told you how boorish that is? Sigh… Well, next up, asparagus.

I distinctly remember telling myself that the horseradish here was too light and the dish perhaps a tad acidic. But not bad. Again, apologies for the patchy descriptions…

Next up is the langostine, and this I remember did not work at all. Every side item here felt acidic, and the langostine itself tasted a bit stringy and bland. I remember being a little disappointed here…

But the next course, the day’s fish. I remember as being absolutely fantastic. The quality of the fish was excellent, though the sauce was again rather unnecessarily acidic — and I just didn’t use it. But the fish, excellent.

The last savoury course was the lamb, which I also remember not working as well. It tasted a little bland. I wish I had the full description here, but I remember telling myself I wish I had more of that excellent fish. Anyway, not a bad series of dishes, but just not great.

The dessert was a nice juniper berry ice cream with that nice pool of salt caramel. Delicious end to it all. And I enjoyed a nice local calvados, recommended by my excellent server. A good night in general, albeit challenged by the annoying behaviour of some of the clientele…

Seriously, is it THAT difficult to pick up your chair, or at least to minimise the noise? Or is it a contest to see who can make the most noise with one’s chair?

Aside from something they can’t control (like Osloans acting boorishly), I think Galt has a lot of promise, as long as they don’t get too sucked into the Nordic acid disease. Let the fresh ingredients speak for themselves. It’s the middle of summer, no need to unnecessarily acidify things that are best left for the winter, bleaker seasons. But enjoyable enough, and it’s recommended.

Galt
Frognerveien 12
Oslo, Norge

Review #3: 15 East

10 June 2019

As I headed to NYC on a messy morning, I tried to figure out where to eat lunch on this stormy Monday morning. The train ride was slow, so I had a little time to think. I was heading over to Europe on a red-eye later, but wanted to have a good lunch at least while I was in NYC.

As I rolled into town, I called 15 East to see if I can secure a sushi bar place. As luck would have it (perhaps thanks to the awful weather), yes — although it took me far longer than anticipated to get there thanks to traffic. I relaxed with some sake and awaited the sushi omakase…

As my readers know, I often bemoan the quality of sushi outside of Japan, and also that 15 East is one of the few places I make an exception; only a few months ago I had a nice lunch there. Unfortunately later on in the trip my phone was stolen, thus my notes. Luckily I had backed up all my photos onto a second device (I do this religiously when I travel) so the photos are here, yet not my notes…

So I will let you use your imagination with these pieces as my brain is too foggy to remember all the details…

Of the early pieces, all were quite good, but the iwashi was quite excellent and the kohada surprisingly nice.

The next half dozen were all quite excellent as well, this was a far better lunch than last time. I so wish I had my notes…

Of the next half dozen, the hotate was better than last time, but the chu-toro was a little weak.

The closing half dozen were rather good, from the torched o-toro to the 2 eels and the 2 uni. Then as last time, they brought out a nice dessert…

A really good lunch. Again, wish I had the notes…but alas it’s frozen on a stolen phone somewhere, likely wiped by a factory reset by now. Oh well. At least I got to enjoy it!

It’s very expensive to have such an experience at 15 East, and I joked to the friendly sushi chef that it may be cheaper to fly to Japan to eat and he nodded and smiled. But it was worth it, as it’s been a few months since I’ve had sushi. Much recommended, if you are in NYC.

15 East
15 East 15th Street
New York, New York

* Took ages to get to the airport, partly due to the helicopter crash way uptown — which caused ride-sharing companies to pursue a ridiculous surcharge ($200+ to JFK from Lower Midtown?!). Luckily as I always do I just hailed a reliable Yellow Cab on the street. Wake up, NYC…