Review: 82 Queen

14 November 2018

Despite a horrible hangover the next morning, I had an extremely busy day in the area that required a vehicle, so off to rent one. Some nice explorations that took me through Magnolia Cemetery, then up the coast to Georgetown, then back for a quick visit to Mepkin Abbey then finally to Middleton Place. At the latter, I had a wonderful slow stroll, hanging out with the many poseurs there…amazing how they all pose for photos!

Long day, and worse, I had logistical issues when I got back that related to the car accident I was in months ago in Pittsburgh, as well as the looming snowstorm that could mess up my flight home tomorrow. That was a damn headache to deal with. I was looking forward to dinner at one of Charleston’s most venerable restaurants, 82 Queen.

I went old-school by going to 82 Queen, somewhere I had a wonderful meal many years ago. I arrived and it was already a bit chaotic. I was seated in the upstairs section, and just as I was relaxing to look through the menu, a huge and noisy group took over the adjacent room. Oh great…

Took for ages to get any service, then finally ordered. Relaxed and relaxed and relaxed and relaxed…took quite a bit of time to get a drink, then more time… Then finally my starter, the pork belly.

Ugh…it’s actually cold. It’s probably been sitting around because no one ran the plate up. This is just awful. By the time I got someone’s attention I’ve already eaten half of it because I’ve not had any food all day and was hungry. Sigh… Awful. They offered to take it off, but they already took off the wine because it took 20 minutes for a glass of wine to appear. This is a shitshow…

Then of course my glass by now was empty, and NO SERVICE STAFF ATTENDED THE DINING ROOM FOR 15 MINUTES. What the heck happened? This is just piss poor FoH management, even with the noisy party that’s clearly annoying other diners as well. Finally someone came up and I ordered my wine. Then the main appeared, the gumbo.

Again, cold, like it was plated and sat around for another 15 minutes without being put under a heat lamp. This is restaurant 101 stuff, how are they screwing this up so badly? The shrimps here were barely edible, and you have a combination of undercooked and overcooked here, with a few colder elements. Now I’m starting to think it wasn’t plated and left around, as the coldness was by ingredient, which means it was put together with a few really bad elements. This is piss poor kitchen work.

This was a total shitshow and I’ve had enough. The manager kept apologising as they noticed how bad things were going, but I’m not gonna even bother. This is a joke. Maybe it’s time for the venerable restaurant to take a breather and re-tool. At least re-train both the FoH and the kitchen.

82 Queen
82 Queen Street
Charleston, South Carolina

* The shitty dinner made me go to the Bar at Husk next door for quite a few drinks. I had planned to avoid Husk due to what I mentioned yesterday, but this was needed. The snacks were awful (terrible pork rinds, even others at the bar complained), but drinks good. Then more drinks around town and it was all a blur…

** The next day a total clusterfuck as American Airlines’s Twitter team decided to bump me from my flight, then LIE to me telling me it was cancelled. It was NOT, it had a mild delay. And more and more BS, I ended up having to stay an extra day in Charleston. Needless to say this is likely the last time I’ll visit Charleston — and DEFINITELY the last time I’ll fly American Airlines.

Review: Circa 1886

13 November 2018

I needed to get out of town for a few days, so made a long-overdue visit to Charleston. I’ve always thought it was a bit overrated, but it’s a good time of year to go to visit a few places I had wanted to visit in town and the area. The trip began badly when unforseen issues closed a location that I made a priority to visit, and no luck in gaining access even pleading by phone. Pain in the arse.

A busy day, no lunch, and I was hungry. There’s plenty of places to pick in Charleston, but for personal reasons I’ve decided to purposely avoid places run by several chefs who are friends of someone who defrauded me a few years ago. This means most of the most popular places in town are out, but I had my eye on Circa 1886 anyway.

I headed to the graceful Wentworth Mansion, where Circa 1886 is based. The dining room was busy, so I told them I’d be happy to just eat at the bar — so they don’t have to waste a four-top on me. I relaxed and had a nice martini as I ordered. Pretty chilled out, though the walk here was quite hazardous with the lack of street lights and terrible condition of the sidewalks and flooded areas everywhere… The martini helped, though the amuse helped far less…

An okay little cheesy croquette and a wee broccoli soup, nothing to really write home about. I switched to a darker cocktail for my first course, the quail.

Not bad, fried pretty well and nicely flavoured. Enjoyed it. Then with a glass of wine, we have the main course, the pork loin.

Cooked very well, and nicely flavoured once again. I really like when modern kitchens cook pork like this, not the horrific dried out, sawdust-leaving loins that I still often see — even in Michelin-starred places. This kitchen has done better than a handful of recent Michelin kitchens I’ve endured…

I was enjoying my evening chatting with other patrons and the staff so I decided to stay for a dessert, and this was definitely the right decision…

I did my best Homer Simpson impression here…mmm…donuts…{gargledrool}…

Really tasty end to the evening. Had a few more drinks before I went to meet my Lyft outside. I’m not risking a walk back after this many drinks in the dark streets out here, so… But a pretty good night, pretty happy with it all.

Circa 1886
149 Wentworth Street
Charleston, South Carolina

* I did, however, decide to go for a nitecap at the venerable Kaminsky’s. I’ve always loved their desserts, but this time was for a bit more booze before I stumbled back to my hotel…

Belfast Disappoints — in So Many Ways…

27-28 October 2018

I spent a relatively quiet 2 days in Belfast, not helped by my bruised toe. But that wasn’t really the crux of my problems in this town, a place that has unfortunately left a rather poor impression in my head long after departing from it.

The dinner at Eipic was certainly not epic, and I have to say the entire dining scene was on the weak side — to be generous. My first day in town I had lunch at a place everyone seemed to recommend, Ginger Bistro.

Thank goodness it was so near my hotel, with my now red and blue toe. I arrived and the service seems a bit spacey. In fact, this was common everywhere in Belfast except for Eipic (tho it did remind me of the very beginning when it was rather spotty). I eventually ordered, after several other tables that had arrived after me had done so… I didn’t think much of it to be honest, but it’s noticeable. I’ll address this later. But first up was one of their signature dishes…

This squid is pretty good, fried very in the old salt-and-pepper method. The advertised spicy dip was really weak tho, so I just enjoyed the squid on its own. Not bad. Then after quite a long wait, the main arrived — lamb.

Well, it perhaps took too long because it was totally overcooked. The meat was dry, but thank goodness for the tasty sauce to make it palatable. The other components, from roots to pea shoots, were quite nice and helped the dish along, but wish the lamb itself was cooked better. Oh well. Took ages to get their attention so I didn’t bother with dessert so just settled up and headed out.

Later I had that dinner at Eipic, and just went to rest my foot. Luckily the next day it was a bit better so managed to explore the town. Good thing about bruises is that they don’t swell badly, so I could just keep going. I ducked into lunch at a place called Home. Let’s see if it’s homey…

Again very loose service, and one server was just plain ignoring me. Took a long time to get anyone’s attention. And by now I’m starting to wonder about why I am singled out to be ignored, and it’s sadly sinking into me. I’ll get to this later. But I ordered and tried to chill out. I gotta say nice music over the PA tho…

The lunch started off with some fried prawns. Not bad, worked okay, more as a snack tho. Went down well with the wine. Then for the main was a pork dish…

Again, overcooked, with some rather dried out pork here. This time the sauce didn’t help it along, as the overdose of beans that seemed undercooked made it a texture nightmare. Not a good dish, and sadly abandoned. Service has improved a bit but if the kitchen can’t really perform I’m not sticking around for a dessert. Sigh…

With a few other examples experienced in town during the 2 days, I am starting to wonder if I’m a victim of casual racism. Even at one point, I won’t mention where, but I was greeted with “oh, you speak English?” by service staff. I should have shouted back “AN BHFUIL GAEILGE AGAT?!” but I was so stunned. And this was not an isolated incident. I’ve never been in a city that I felt so disrespected in my life.

That did not improve when I headed to James St. for dinner. Supposedly highly rated for steaks, but I was greeted again strangely by the service staff so I just ordered a pasta to see how it goes…

And this crab linguine was a cry for help. The pasta was cooked okay, but the sauce and crab was just awful. Throw in the very questionable service and the really annoying American tourists next to me, I called it a night and went to get some take-away and give up on this city.

Sorry, Belfast, you won’t see me come back. This short stay was basically a disaster, and frankly this place still has a lot of growing up to do and to ditch some attitudes that most of the world has for decades.

Ginger Bistro
68-72 Great Victoria Street

Home
22 Wellington Place

James St.
19-21 James Street South
Belfast, Northern Ireland

* Perhaps as a fitting final headache from this place, the lady at Belfast City Airport was probably the rudest airline worker I have ever met in my life — this is from 90+ flights a year, mind you. A quick stop in Bournemouth and then across the Pond and home…

Review: Eipic

27 October 2018

Things started today the worst way possible, and every frequent traveller can attest to this happening. Unfamiliar hotel room, and you start the day by KICKING something hard — like the bedframe. Ouch. Needless to say this made the trek out to Belfast less than comfortable, and the day very annoying, if not outright painful at times.

A nice morning slow stroll, a little ouchy at times, and a so-so lunch, and a more uncomfortable afternoon as my toe is now fully bruised…oh, I so need a good dinner. Tonight’s destination is Eipic by Deanes, one of few places in Belfast to have earned a Michelin star. I made this booking over a month ago, before this run of Michelin fails the past week plus:

Tafelspitz 1876* in Düsseldorf
Chapter One* in Dublin
Pollen Street Social** in London

I got to Eipic and was given a nice table — once I found out how to get into the restaurant proper. Relaxed with a drink and I relaxed after going with the full tasting. This is the final tasting menu in Europe for 2018, so let’s hope it doesn’t end like some of the above. After a wee time, some snacks appeared…

Not a bad selection. The tomato consommé was pretty tasty, the chickpea crisp not bad, and the shallot bite quite nice. The service has ground to a bit of a snail’s pace here, as it took about 20 minutes even for those snacks to appear, and another 20 minutes or so before a Tasmanian pinot noir is poured for the first course.

 

Smoked mushrooms, not bad but a bit underseasoned. The smoke was quite nice, but the crackling and grain added the wrong type of texture to this dish and took out the delicate nature of the mushrooms. Not bad of a dish, but could have been so much better. Let’s see what comes with the second dish, as a really big pour of Riesling signalled its appearance.

Seafood ravioli, a beautiful plate, and some nice flavours here with the lobster emulsion. Pretty tasty ravioli (tho one seems to be significantly smaller than the other), cooked well. I’m glad I had plenty of bread to soak up the delicious emulsion. Good dish, things moving well. And I have to say the pours here are extremely generous, demonstrated again by a nice chenin blanc from Stellenbosch for the third dish — brill.

Unfortunately the fish was cooked rather uneven, but at least the flavour is quite good — once you try to ignore how crazy uneven it was. The “bone sauce” was fabulous, could have used more of it to help the fish along. The kohlrabi was excellent, and all of it worked very well with the wine. For all the kitchen inconsistencies, the FoH seems to have totally waken up now and the wine pours have been extremely generous and service very smooth.

 

I relaxed and caught my breath knowing that the next item is the last of the savouries, and that was confirmed by the appearance of the venison.

First of all, it’s cooked well, which is always saying a lot. Good flavours all around, perhaps not quite as good as at Timberyard the other day in Edinburgh, but it’s very tasty. The advertised “spice” was on the mild side but worked very well, though I for one can’t wait to see the end of the seasonal pumpkin use as I am never a fan of it. So glad winter is approaching…

Although somewhat inconsistent, the flavours have been generally good. I still think a Michelin-starred kitchen should be more consistent, but considering the rubbish I’ve had recently this is far above the 3 I listed above. Then with a nice semi-sweet poured we have a nice dessert.

Sea buckthorn ice cream! I love sea buckthorn, its tanginess is just so addictive. Love this. Then a tad sweeter dessert wine is poured, again a healthy portion, and we have the final dessert based on apple and chocolate.

An odd combination as I thought it clashed, so I ate them separately. The apple sorbet on its own was delicious, as was the white chocolate mousse within the “apple” crust. So it worked well in its own way. That was a nice close. Then a bit of a closer with some coffee.

The service has turned excellent through the evening so I was happy to enjoy a bit of a tipple afterwards. I saw the place filling up on this busy Saturday evening, so I moved up to the bar to free up the table. Then a bit of an odd situ as whilst I enjoyed my drink standing at the bar, someone came to say hello — and I was a little shocked as it was the FoH manager from Chapter One in Dublin. He came up for the weekend with his partner so that was nice, and was nice for him to come to say hello — despite my somewhat harsh comments about his place when I was there. But I did say he seemed like the only person to have actually cared what I said. But that was awkward…

Anyway, Eipic overall isn’t bad. Service turned wonderful once they got moving, but the kitchen was a little too inconsistent for this level — supposedly. I have no bloody idea anymore, as Michelin-starred places are often so poor in my experience. Of the 28 Michelin-starred restaurants in Europe I have dined in 2018, I would say more than half were not worth my time or money. I think that is a indictment of how poor Michelin is becoming.

Well, what can I say. I know for sure in 2019 I will not be visiting 28 Michelin starred restaurants in Europe — or anywhere. This was not quite a whimper, but was nowhere near a bang. It’s…it’s…Michelin mediocrity…

Eipic
27-40 Howard Street
Belfast, Northern Ireland

Review: Ondine

26 October 2018

I had a busy afternoon, but thank goodness today was the least hectic day of the week. Finished some annoying logistical planning and paperwork, thankfully fuelled by that excellent lunch at White Horse. But I was also looking forward to dinner at Ondine, often called the best seafood place in Edinburgh.

I headed there for a long hike uphill on the Royal Mile, seeing some of my old haunts (including a dreaded hotel I shudder recalling) and got to Ondine. Already the service was a mess as they were near the end of a busy Friday evening happy hour. Lucky I caught it, and someone bothered to serve me in time, as I ordered some oysters to get the night going.

Not bad, a nice assortment. Sorry about the weird colour in the photos, but the place is BATHED in a really annoying red/pink light that gave me a headache… And there was one server who was ignoring me with a look of pure hostility. What is up with some people these days? Sigh… Anyway, my server was pleasant enough (also Italian) and recommended a few things, and I went with one of my call and one of his recs.

I enjoyed my wine as the place quieted down a bit during the transition from the oyster happy hour to the Friday night dinner crowd when my dressed crab dish arrived.

Not bad, but nothing too special. Inevitable with this dish you get a lot of loose rogue cartilage, but this dish seemed just a bit messier than you’d expect. Then the main course arrived, the langoustines.

You may wonder why I went with this considering where I was just a week or so earlier, but they said it was fresh, so I wanted to compare. Yep, no comparison, these were nowhere as good as the ones in the Faroes. Not bad, but nothing special.

With the shaky (albeit friendly from the one guy) service, I decided to call it a night here. I was tired and I have a stupidly early morning flight tomorrow to Belfast, so I thanked them and headed out…

Ondine is a bit more show than substance, though the oysters were good. However, White Horse is far better on both departments, and if you have a seafood craving I’d recommend White Horse instead of Ondine for all the reasons you can imagine — better kitchen, better service, better price.

Plus, you don’t get a headache from that red/pink light at Ondine…

Ondine
2 George IV Bridge
Edinburgh, Scotland

* In fact I took my own advice and stopped at White Horse en route back and had a few drinks and a last half dozen oysters…

Reviews: White Horse

25-26 October 2018

I mentioned in the previous review about the nice dinner at Timberyard. But earlier in the day, as I was heading back to my hotel dead tired, I noticed a place just steps away from it called White Horse. I thought about a quick late lunch, so I stepped in there.

Turns out to be quite a nice oyster and seafood place, and I sat at the bar and had a good chat with the very friendly crew there. So I started with some oysters, and they brought me half a dozen locals.

Very tasty, love the flavour of these local oysters. Not quite as good as those New Zealand bluff oysters that has utterly ruined me but these were quite nice. Good enough for me to order a few more things. I enjoyed another cocktail chatting with the friendly Italian bartender when they arrived. First up, razors.

I love razors, and this was a nice rendition. Love the addition of chorizo, which worked really well with the spicy oil. Very tasty. Then next up, which was the bartender’s recommendation, the octopus.

Also quite delicious, with a generous portion of delicious merguez as well. Cooked perfectly, lovely flavours in the octopus. A nice discovery! In fact, so good that I came back for lunch the next day…

I returned and the same staff seemed happy to see me. I had actually dropped by after my dinner at Timberyard for a quick drink before going back to my hotel, so they are used to me now I reckon! I relaxed with another of their cocktails and ordered. Was good to chat with several of the now-familiar FoH staff as I enjoyed my drink, and soon my food.

First up was scallops. Not bad, but a little underseasoned. And honestly as I said the Faroes have really ruined me for scallops, but these were far better than the ones I had at Michelin-starred Chapter One in Dublin or the rather dubious ones at similarly-starred Tafelspitz 1876 in Düsseldorf… I also had a side of broccolini.

Delicious, a big side, but worked well with all my dishes. Next up, mackerel…

Oh this was so delicious, cooked so well… All the wonderful oily flavours were retained, yet the texture really fabulous without sacrificing taste. About as good as last night’s fabulous rendition. This kitchen has some chops for sure! I finished off the fish and the vegetables, but had room for a last snack, so the now-familiar bartender suggested some salmon…

And it was a good call. Surprisingly good, full of flavour. I’ve become a bit numb to smoked salmon, but this was a nice flavourful dish to call it an afternoon.

Highly recommended, an accidental and pleasant discovery! Excellent kitchen, wonderful FoH staff, a really cool place to hang out for some food and drinks. I’m quite happy to have discovered this place, and this is some of the best food I’ve had since I left the Faroes, and puts so much of the Michelin laggards to shame.

Check it out, you won’t be disappointed!

White Horse
266 Canongate, Royal Mile
Edinburgh, Scotland

Review: Timberyard

25 October 2018

After last night’s calamitous “dinner” at Aizle, I was apprehensive about this evening’s dinner plans. I had another ridiculous busy day that took me all over the Lothians — including the magnificent Dean Cemetery. Even though I had a nice late lunch (which I’ll discuss in the next review) I was hungry. When I arrived at Timberyard on a misty evening, I was tired and hungry.

I was led to the bar, which was already busy. Oh well, at least some folks to talk to. I relaxed and looked over the menu, enjoying an opening cocktail, and hoped it goes far smoother than last night. As a worked on the cocktail a series of amuse comes through…

The first plate was sad looking but the beet was nice, as was the sausage and the rather mauled pickle. The second was a nice local seaweed with a very tasty sauce based on oyster. The last was a good ol’ oyster, which was quite tasty too. A good start, and my cocktail was finished. A pour of a Riesling from Mosel and we start off with the crab dish.

Not bad, definitely a generous portion under the kohlrabi. A bit sloppy as I nearly broke a tooth, but that’s par for the course. Lovely flavour here, enhances the natural goodness of the crab. A good start. Then with an English (!!) wine, we have the mackerel.

Now this is nice. This has a distinct Japanese feel to it, and it was cooked very well. Lovely quality of one of my favourite oily fish, perfect skin. The daikon added to the Japanese theme, as did the really tasty broth on the side. I’m starting to feel confident here about this evening!

Next up was hen egg with an assortment of fungi, from hen of the woods to truffles to chanterelles. A tasty selection of mushrooms for sure, the hen of the woods was particularly fantastic. Another winner here! Then with a beaujolais nouveau we have the partridge.

Nicely cooked, lovely flavour. I’m not the biggest partridge fan, but this was really nice. I enjoyed the chunk of celeriac too on the side, which was surprisingly delicious. The good dinner, albeit a little slow, is going very nicely. Good, well-informed staff made the time pass right by. Then with a aged chardonnay we have the hake.

Again, hake not one of my usual favourites, but this was surprisingly good. The meaty fish was extremely strong, with a nice assortment of shoots to help it along. Another surprisingly good dish. I think I am sold on this place already, as we move to the final savoury dish — venison.

Kudos to this kitchen for cooking this so well. Delicious, the meat sourced well and executed perfectly. I love venison when it’s cooked well, and this was indeed such an example. The beets and curd added to the richness of this dish, playing off the berry-based sauce very well. Indeed an excellent dish, I almost wished the savouries would continue!

Alas, no as we move into the latter segment. First up, a dessert based on cherry.

Very nice, the main ingredient presented in several ways, each of them delicious. The topping on the hazlenut ice cream is just wonderful. Then finally, with an ice cidre poured, we have the final item, their take on the bramble.

Again, a delicious assortment of items, from plums to walnuts, brought this traditional pudding to modern tastes. A nice close, and that ice cidre is just awesome… A wonderful dinner! The crew was very friendly so I stayed to drink for a bit, enjoying a few nice tipple before I ventured into the rain for the bus back to my hotel.

After last night’s mess I didn’t expect that much from tonight, but goodness I was proved wrong. What an awesome place here. Excellent cooking, friendly and efficient staff. And no disgruntled chef! Nothing to be disgruntled about, some fabulous items, especially the venison and mackerel.

This is how you do it! Highly recommended!

Timberyard
10 Lady Lawson Street
Edinburgh, Scotland

Cluster… (Review: Aizle)

24 October 2018

Honestly I don’t think I’ve ever had an experience like I had at Aizle this evening in Edinburgh, and it was one of the most off-putting dining experiences I’ve ever had in my life. I contemplated not writing this review, but decided to at the end. You can judge for yourself, but needless to say I will never step foot into this place again.

After that dismal few days in London, I was happy to head north for a few days back in Scotland. I’ve been back to Scotland only once after I moved away from Aberdeen. This stop takes me to Edinburgh, a place I truly love. I arrived in the windy, cold city (my kind of weather!) and spent the day exploring places I’ve never really spent much time, including several of the cemeteries that are farther from the centre.

I was knackered, and having skipped lunch I was looking forward to a nice dinner. Tonight’s destination is Aizle, which is on everyone’s radar. I headed there and was given a nice table in the inner section as I relaxed. There’s no menu here, just a blackboard with today’s ingredients. Interesting stuff, and soon a dry cidre was poured and we start with ajoblanco.

Not bad, a good use of cucumbers here, very almondy overall. I like the taste but considering for most people it’s a freezing cold night, a cold soup was a brave start to this meal. I like it. Then the next two items were nice wee bites.

The croquette with XO was interesting, while the tartar in pastry was nice — albeit the horseradish very mild. A good start so far, and that cidre from Brittany was very tasty. Then a pinot noir is poured for the first proper course, a “pasta” of sorts…

Hmmm, it looks a bit more like it after I mixed it up…

Nice tastes of mushrooms and onions here, though as you know truffles are not my favourites. But in an odd way, works okay. And the best part is the excellent bread, using a sourdough culture from when they first opened. Really nice. Then a Weißburgunder from Austria and we have the trout from the west of Scotland.

Lovely flavours here, the trout also cooked perfectly. Some of the assorted fried goods and the sauce were not really necessary as the fish was so strong here. Good stuff, enjoyiing the evening so far. Although the music is a bit on the edge here, which is fine, not my flavour, but whatever works. Then a temperanillo is poured for the short rib.

Well, didn’t work as well as the previous item that’s for sure. Really boring flavours, and the meat is not cooked as well as you’d expect. It’s a bit of a messy bit all forced on by the sauce.

At this point I was a little annoyed by the aforementioned music over the PA, as the rap they are playing now are openly using the N-word. Honestly, I do not like eating in a restaurant and hearing that word being used repeatedly. I can’t imagine others would too, but to be fair no one else was dining alone so probably didn’t bother paying attention to something like that. Or worse, people have become numb to it. I made a point to mention this to my server and tweeted my displeasure to this — which is a continuation of what I brought up earlier about my dinner at Michelin-starred Plumed Horse in California.

Then this is when things went all wacko. Chef Stuart Ralston apparently took exception to my comments and game out to have a verbal go at me. Really? Do you realise this industry is called hospitality? A chef venting like this at a customer is really unprofessional. I won’t recount what he said, albeit full of contradictions from one sentence to next, needless to say it was off-putting. His staff were very apologetic afterwards but that was futile.

I asked for the bill and walked out, despite the constant apologies of his staff. I suspect something similar has happened in the past, as they seem to know what to do when a customer walks out mid-dinner. This is ridiculous to say the least.

This reminds me of that jackhole Graham Elliot and his staff in Chicago confronting me when I tweeted that the tasting menu wasn’t going that great. Instead of asking me why, they came out to confront me rudely, and treated me like hell the entire night. It’s frustrating when people do not try to learn why customers are unhappy, but rather get into their face instead. I know how hard this industry is, trust me, but taking it out on a customer is not the right way to vent your frustrations over cancelled bookings that one tweeted about themselves earlier. You talk about how hard it is to run a small independent restaurant of quality? Yes it indeed is. But you shoot yourself in the foot when you play comedy like this for no reason.

I’ve got nothing more to say about this place.

Aizle
107-109 Saint Leonard’s Street
Edinburgh, Scotland

London: What Has Happened to This Place???

20-22 January 2018

You’d think an extended weekend in London would be wonderful for dining, right? Well, you thought wrong. Being a bit on the busy side, and knowing London’s booking nightmares especially on weekends, I decided for the most part to visit my long-time favourites. Having been a very frequent visitor and 2-time resident, there are plenty of places that are still around that I consider my “regulars” over the years.

After last night’s extremely excellent dinner at Kiln, I was hoping for more good stuff the next few days. I was running around crazy all day Saturday, so a quick drop into my “regular” kebab joint near Paddington, a place that I’ve used since 1997 (and have probably consumed several cores of döner in aggregation), sadly it’s just not right anymore. Terrible pita, a shadow of its former self… For dinner I headed out early again, to another of my all-time faves, El Pirata in Mayfair.

I’ve always had a soft spot for this place, which is not on the hipster tapas trail by any means, but has always been solid for me. But today it seems to not flow too smoothly at first, but that’s not unusual here. As I always do, the opener was some Cinco Jotas jamón ibérico…

Good, but for some reason not as good as usual. I always wonder why they kept it in the kitchen, to absorb all the fried and plancha aromas, but that wasn’t the problem. Couldn’t put my fingers on it… Then a trio of items…

Well, a mixed bag. The gulas (fake) is always done well here (especially for bread dipping), but today was especially oily — almost seems like they diluted the good olive oil here with something greasier… The riñones was not that good, definitely not as good as at my “other” usual (and old-school) Spanish place, San Miguel. And the champiñones were rather good, finally, as the oil had a nice spicy kick — and a quality that should have been for the gulas. Sigh…I hate when somewhere that has been reliable for so long — in this case, nearly 2 decades — is failing me… I gave them one last shot with the grilled sardines…

Not bad at all, but nothing special. Any place can do this dish right frankly. It’s a bit of a cluster now and I wanted to go with another jamón for dessert (like I always do) but it was so chaotic I didn’t bother. Had a terrible sorbet and I found my way out the door. Sigh, what’s happened to somewhere that I’ve been to several dozen times in the last 20 years? Sadly, this is a sign of what’s to come for the rest of this London trip…

The next day had a busy morning, and was meeting with a friend in the early afternoon back in Mayfair, so looked around for something that was open, and I walked into the original location of Burger & Lobster. Bad move. Full of confused tourists, and the staff seem unfriendly and inefficient, as I heard 2 broken glasses within minutes of arriving — and not being served. I finally got one’s attention and ordered something. I had to finish quickly, so just decided to stick with this place despite the bad vibe. Bad move, as the so-called Holy F*ck burger was a hipster-driven joke…

What is this obsession with burgers that one cannot eat without unhinging one’s jaw? The patty was basically a smashed meatball, and it was impossible to eat. Also total false advertising about the heat here, this is just plain boring. One of the most overpriced burgers I’ve had in my life, and it was piss poor. I would have taken a Wendy’s double just about at this point instead. Sad, pathetic example of hipsterism at its worse… I paid and walked out. Another reason London’s turned into a joke…

Luckily had a good afternoon drinking with friends, but I had to head back to my hotel to take a poorly-timed conference call (why on a Sunday evening?). And of course it ended in less than 10 minutes because 2 parties didn’t show up…geez, what a waste. So I looked to see where I could get a booking, and the nearby Hereford Road was available. It’s always been one of my favourites since I visited a few weeks after it opened. Chef Tom Pemberton’s work has always been amongst my London favourites, and I’ve had more than a dozen good meals here over the many years, though a previous visit when Chef Pemberton was not in the house was rather poor…

And he was not, this Sunday evening. Place was empty, which is not a good sign. Dirty tables, which is inexcusable especially in a small and empty restaurant. Server was dismissive and not very pleasant, never offered bread, but I placed my order and just nursed my wine — so I don’t have to deal with her. The duck heart starter was piss poor. The beans were cold, and they taste like they’ve sat around for awhile. Poor quality, stringy. And the duck hears were extremely boring. What’s happened to this place? At one time this was one of the best kitchens in all of London.

And the main, the Blytheburgh pork chop was almost as dreadful, with even worse beans if you can imagine. The pork itself was way overcooked, even as I asked for it not to be. Borderline sawdust stuff. Again, what’s happened to the once-always-reliable place? Is this what happens when Chef Pemberton is not here, again? This is just awful. I paid and left and never looked back…another one in the dust. What a damn shame!

What in earth is happening to London? Previously reliable places are all messy, like the steam has been taken out of the engine and they’re just going through the motions for money. The soul is gone, a hollow machine. I’m almost glad I’ve not visited for awhile, as it’s sad to see such a general decline in quality everywhere.

The next day that conclusion reached a horrible crescendo. I had a very busy day as it was my last full day in town, and some errands that I’ve put off could not be put off anymore, including an unpleasant argument at my (soon to be former) bank. But a long day, interrupted by some poor dimsum at another of my “regular” haunts, came to an even worse situation at what you’d expect to be good — Pollen Street Social.

I met up with a dear friend for dinner, both of us thanking our lucky stars to have survived a car crash the past year. We chose this place as it has always had a good reputation, but from the onset things were a mess. I had a bad feeling that my Michelin curse was gonna continue tonight.

Frankly, the night was so poor I didn’t even take pictures. Really poor service, forgetting wine and just sheer sloppiness. I’ve never seen so many spilled liquids on my table from supposedly-trained FoH staff. Not just one weak link, but even the sommelier was the sloppiest I’ve ever seen — not to mention forgetful. Boring series of amuse, and I’m glad we didn’t opt for a tasting menu. The snail dish was awful, undercooked, may be the worst snail dish I’ve had in my entire life. And the partridge was okay, but nothing to write home about. Definitely not cooked as well as the mallard at The Greenhouse in Dublin the other night. And just some overpriced, boring sorbet. A ridiculously overpriced evening for poor cooking and bad service. Definitely not worth any photos. This is another example of the joke Michelin is becoming. Keep away from this calamity!

Overall, one of the most noticeable things about London is the shocking decline in service. From small places to Michelin-starred eateries, I’ve not seen this level of poor service in years. I’ve also noticed that none of my servers spoke Polish or Lithuanian, as many have likely left London ahead of Brexit for greener pastures. They had brought, after a little time, a quite good level of service to London eateries across the board, but now it is calamitous. At Pollen Street Social, I’ve never seen such sloppy service in a Michelin-starred place. I can’t count how many times liquids were badly spilled by multiple members of the service staff.

I headed to Cambridge the next day, and frankly the BBQ I had there was better than any of the food I’ve had since that awesome night at Kiln. London is history for me. I probably should have planned better and checked out places I’ve not been, but when you have so many social obligations too, it’s hard to plan anything in advance for this leg. Lesson learned, and it’s left a permanent black mark in my head about this town I used to love so much…

Sigh…

El Pirata
5-6 Down Street

Burger & Lobster
29 Clariges Street

Hereford Road
3 Hereford Road

Pollen Street Social
8-10 Pollen Street
London, England

Review: Kiln

19 October 2018

I made it back to London, the first time I’ve been back in a very long time. It’s strange how you fall out of love with a city, one that had been home twice in my life. But since an unfortunate case of racist abuse post-Brexit vote diminished an already wavering interest in this town, I’ve all but tried to avoid coming back. But here I am, having escaped Dublin for a surprisingly functional Heathrow. Yes, I’m not writing “Deathrow” for once because it was actually functional…

I had a busy afternoon as I had to run a bunch of errands, it being Friday afternoon. But I was done early, so I went ahead with my original plan of dropping into the much-hyped Kiln in Soho. I’ve read so much good stuff on this place I couldn’t help to think it was overhyped. Once I arrived, I immediately relaxed, as the friendly staff talked me through the food and drinks menu.

It was still nice and quiet at 5pm, so I ordered a cocktail and some food and enjoyed the ambience.

The music is one of the best parts of this place, all played from a turntable at the corner of the bar. Vintage LPs…they’ll always beat the playlists at other places. I like this place!

I like this place even more now! I ordered all three of the starters, and this aged lamb with cumin skewer is just so good. The lamb, aged to give it a fuller flavour, really stood out after being perfectly grilled…

And this chicken, damn it’s meaty and tasty, with some perfect skin to boot. I’ve not had chicken this good since some expertly-grilled ones at my “local” in Tokyo, Hinaiya…

Then this Issan-style Tamworth sausage is just delicious, love the spicy kick to it. This adaptation of the wonderful north-eastern Thai treat, together with the previous two, made for a wonderful start to this early evening. I know now to keep ordering!

I enjoyed another interesting cocktail as we went along, a fun crowd as well. It’s far less annoying than at counters that are way too overcrowded with questionably space allocation like the nearby Bocca di Lupo, so it made it much more enjoyable. I ordered a second set of food and enjoyed the ambience and excellent music. Ah, then the next set arrived…

Wow, this is stupid good. Minced Tamworth pork is cooked with a dry, southern Thai curry. Lovely kick to it, bringing out the wonderful flavour of the pork. I can east several plates of this, and the spice sweats now has really kicked in. Loving this! Then the next item, something that almost everyone orders here it seems, the clay pot glass noodles.

I hate to say it, but this was the weakest dish of the night. Tasty, with some nice flavours, but it’s insanely hard to eat especially if it’s overcooked. With a crowded counter, the hardest job is NOT TO SPRAY YOUR NEIGHBOUR trying to pull the sticky noodles up. It’s milder than the previous dish, so perhaps it’s also the procession order that was my mistake, but for me this was so-so, albeit very filling.

I was having too much fun chatting with the staff and other diners I decided to stay a little longer, but telling them that I am happy to move on whenever they need the space. I ordered another cocktail and a few last treats and enjoyed just hanging out as this place is now insanely busy — with waits at over 3 hours. I can now understand why!

And this is why? A last treat of two of the openers, first the lamb…as good as the first…then the sausage, which was even better.

Oh, this place is awesome, I have a new favourite place in Soho now! I had one last cocktail as the group of 3 I had been chatting with departed, and was also told they’ll need to seat a group of 4 here soon, so I relaxingly finished up and thanked them and took my leave.

I fought through the hoardes of human misery to Oxford Circus to get the heck out of the area. Thank goodness for that awesome food, or else this would have been just excrutiating. But Kiln is very highly recommended! Fabulous food, wonderful staff, excellent drinks, and just a cool ambience. Just please, no one spill anything (especially the noodle pot!) onto that turntable!

Hey, if I’d fight through a typically insane London crowd to eat here, you know it must be good. Easily the best thing I had in London during this 4-day stay, and everyone I’ve told about this place since has also raved about it, so it’s not just me! And people happily wait 3+ hours! So check it out — and if there’s no space, leave your number, head out for a few drinks, and come back and enjoy some amazing food!

Kiln
58 Brewer Street
London, England